Saturday, January 21, 2006

Fak me,Wot a Sight.

Even as thousands of Londoners lined both sides of the
Thames to witness a sight never seen in living memory,
the emergency services,Greenpeace,P.E.T.A. and the
Anti-terrorist squad were swinging in to action.In a
turn-about of events ,a spokesperson for Greenpeace,
Mz. Liz Dunga-Rees said ,

"It is vital that we all work together to prevent the
demise of something so rare and close to extinction
as this.They were at their most plentiful at the turn of
the 19th century and continued to prosper right up to
comparatively recent times,but since the 70s most
have been hunted out of existence.We only have
ourselves to blame.",she added,shaking her cropped-
haired head bitterly.

A Thames Light-house man,also an endangered
species,who did not wish to be named said,

"Fak me,I thought I was seeing fakin' things as it
cruised up past me." He went on to say,

"I've never seen anything like it, "

"Theres never been anything like it" said his wife

"Ohhh,I've never seen anything like it in my life."



Now becoming increasingly distressed and
disorientated there is a real danger of it either
running aground or getting tangled in some of the
numerous obstructions to be found in Mother
Thames.To date, all attempts at empathy or
establishing contact have failed,including the
playing of Whales-in-distress sounds at the mouth
of the river.

The Sun Newspaper (sic) have launched a
Get your tits out campaign to raise awareness,
page three girl ,Gee-Gee said,

"The only thing for it is flash our tits in solidarity
so,come on girls,show them what we're made of."

A spokesman for the Japanese Embassy said,

" おはようございます どうもありがとうございます "

She finished by saying,

"どうもありがとうございます " **

The fact,however,is nobody knows why a fully-functioning
Japanese Whaler should suddenly appear outside the
Houses of Parliament on the river Thames.

** "Fucked if I know "

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

おはようございます you!
You どうもありがとうございます おはようございます you.

Dr Maroon said...

Call me Ishmael.

Charlie said...

From hells heart i stab at thee!

LindyK said...

Well done, Docky, you stole my line! Too bad there aren't really any other good whale-related lines to quote...

Did you hear the poor bastard died after all that commotion? How's that for an ending?!

Willy C Wuddle said...

I'm drunker than a phart and I really like Anti-Barnney's site. That purple assed dinosaur is a goof ass. If I ever go drinking with him, I hope he buys a beverage store.

SafeTinspector said...

The Whaler or the Whale? I'm afraid....