The following takes us beyond the edge of decency, again, if you are easily
offended, I thought I told you to fuck off.
After the night I had just experienced I knew I could die a
happy man, but not just yet, not without a drink first, at least.
My temple was throbbing as much as my "head" was
" I suppose a drink is out of the question."
WHACK. Mbosi lashed the hilt across my shin.
He was not a large man, rather on the small side, petite even,
all right, he was a fuckin' dwarf and the little bollix was enjoying
our present circumstance.
" Fuck you, I want a drink."
Thinks......... " Rule 1, Do not aggravate a Dwarf with a bayonet "
" I am not happy." said Mbosi.
" well which one are you ?" God help me, I couldn't resist it.
Obviously not the first time he heard it.
Thinks............ " Rule 2, for fuck's sake, heed rule 1.
" Mr. Barney, you have something I and my large organization
want and need."
" If you keep flicking that bayonet, you'll have something I
want and need."
Thinks.................... " Jaysus.", says............
" Fuck you, shortarse, who let you out ? "
" Where did you learn to scam ? You must've gone to the
George Bush school of scamming.
Thinks.................... Rule 1, rule 1, for fucks sake, rule 1.
" Do you know," says the little bollix, I was quite hoping you'd
be un-cooperative, we'll see how cocky you are when we're
finished with you." He reached down and produced a small
leather case and slowly unzipped it.
" O.K. Rosie, you know what to do."
Jesus, did she know. Out of the case he palmed a video camera
as Rosie begun to caress my tenderest bits. It was plain to all
that I was heroically trying to ignore Rosie's devilish ministrations,
no more than reasonably successfully when Katya intervened.
" Perhaps I can encourage him." she said slyly and Mbosi
nodded his agreement.
Thinks....................I'm bolloxed now.
She rummaged about on the table and came up behind me
with a tumbler full of Hennessy, cradled my head with one
hand and poured the French-style water-of-life into my
parched mouth and I could've sworn she gave me a con-
piratorial wink as she did so, she also " cradled " my other
bits when she'd emptied the glass.
It wasn't exactly my idea of torture, I thought, as the
brandy kicked in and the chemicals of the previous night
released their residue. I'll tell you one thing, that Rosie
knew her job, I'd swear she could suck the chrome off a
tow-bar ball-hitch. I closed my eyes and let nature and
Rosie take its course and just as the fireworks started,
the fireworks started.